SEARCH AND SEIZURE

untouchables-1a

“If you go through this door now without revising Section 132 you’re walking into a wall of trouble…………… You understand ?”

untouchables-2

“Yes  I do”

untouchables-3

“Good !!”

untouchables-4

“Give me that  axe !”

 

Some readers may recall how I went about preparing for the CA Intermediate exam. If you don’t, do me a favour and please check  out the epilogue of the article in this link.

https://thezolazone.wordpress.com/2015/10/24/25-years-of-michael-madana-kama-rajan-a-celebration-part-iii/

My friend Shyam (name changed) and I were the last in our batch to pass the Intermediate.

Having passed the exam we again lapsed into our lackadaisical ways when our more proactive classmates were already through the final exam and in the placement zone.

After passing the intermediate the Institute of Chartered Accountants gives you a one metre thick bunch of study materials comprising all the subjects. Any chapter could be removed from the “mother ship” so that if one wants to study a particular chapter, you don’t have to hold the entire bunch.

“Now that you’ve passed CA Inter, go and collect your CA Final study materials………………and use it as a pillow” was the helpful advice of my friend Vijai (name retained). If you want to know Vijai better, again, do me a favour, and check out the link below.

https://thezolazone.wordpress.com/2015/11/24/vijai-the-man-and-his-musings/

 

I followed that advice to the T  with the result that I was  left wringing my hands when the day of judgement drew near.

Again Shyam and I regrouped to tackle this new menace.

This time the joint study operation was not conducted at my home but at the CA institute library.

 

Did I say “Joint study” ?  If there was any studying done I was the one who was doing it.

Even in the era before cell phones, while waiting inside the CA institute library, Shyam mysteriously knew when he had visitors outside  and excused himself umpteen times to go out of the library and have tea with the visitor at the  tea stall outside the institute next to the 29C bus stop.

The portions were voluminous and just wouldn’t get through my head. I’d navigated  taxation pretty well in the intermediate but the final portions were a different  kettle of fish altogether.

Shyam never lost his supreme sense of assurance.

 

“Machcheee……….” he said with the quiet confidence of a  Usain Bolt, his eyes half closed as if delivering the Sermon on the Mount.

“Kandippaa indha dhadavai Search and Seizure varudhu. Adha padichchaa poadhum” he declared.

(“Definitely  a question on Search and Seizure Sec.132 will be asked this time. Just read that and go for the exam”)

I let that  nugget of information sink in.

The note on Search and Seizure was less than one page but it was so dense and complex nothing would register no matter how many times I studied it.

Shyam reiterated his admonition not once but several times after that particular day.

I soldiered on but to no avail.

 

Come the day of the exam and I was nervous and frightful. A substantial part of my nails were gone and with it some skin and flesh too.

I don’t recall if the taxation exam was the last one but it seemed like the deciding play off.

 

Now there was another friend of mine, Nitin (name changed) who was the type who would sincerely read the nook and corner of every chapter in the book.

As per the seating arrangement, Nitin and I were placed in the same examination room. And just a row apart.

The unsystematic guys like yours truly were boning up on the chapters frantically upto the time we were due to enter the exam hall while the sincere Sivamanis like Nitin were blasé about the whole thing.

 

I told Nitin about Shyam’s prediction on Sec.132 Search and Seizure.

Nitin was dismissive and waved off that foolishness with “Adhellaam chanceay illa – varavay varaadhu” (“No way a question from that topic will come in the exam”).

After what Nitin had said I gave up and braced myself  for my next attempt at the exam six months later.

A random thought struck me….a recording in my memory from  a few years ago.

 “Dont WAIT for it to happen”

“Dont even WANT it to happen”

“Jusht WATCH……………..

when it DOES HAPPEN”

It seemed to  take care of my nerves and  fidgeting.

I sighed and paused to drop my bag outside the examination room and took a deep breath.

My mind cleared somewhat…..actually it was  as BLANK as a white wall.

 

Then something else struck me.

I had this typical bourgeois mind set that if I did not know the answers I didn’t deserve to pass.

Not that I had NOT studied but it just wouldn’t enter my head.

 

I harked back to the ICWA Final Examination taxation paper.

I’d prepared very well for that one.

But after entering the examination hall and looking at the paper I kept staring at it for more than half an hour. My friend  Bala (name changed)  was seated  next to me and he was in a daze too.

Then I determined to make a good fist of it and  after I started scribbling some answers, ideas started expanding like a bullet in my head.

Actually I was at my creative best.

With due respect to Arun Jaitley, P.Chidambaram and other legal stalwarts and finance ministers, I did a great job of  creating my own Wealth Tax Act and Gift Tax Act !!

My friend, Bala, watched me for sometime  and was livid.

“Dei !! Yennadaa yezhudhara ?”  he asked in a shocked hoarse whisper.

(What are you writing ??!!)

What could I tell him ?

 

To cut a long story short, I cleared THAT paper.

 

SO  WHY  NOT  NOW ?

 

Just a minute before entering the CA Final examination hall, I again took out the portion of the study material on Search and Seizure and   read  through that damned Section 132.

It seemed to stick in my brain on this reading. I kept it back in my bag, flung it to one corner and finally entered the hall.

 

 I was uncharacteristically casual even after the question paper was dropped by the invigilator at my table.

But one look at it and I was anything but casual………………

 

Actually I was cockahoop with joy !

Sure enough a question on Search and Seizure was included in the question paper…………………………….

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

for TWELVE MARKS !!

I muddled through the rest of the tough paper.

 

When the results came out in January, my mark sheet showed that I’d been given

 EXACTLY 40  MARKS in taxation.

 I had  PASSED !!

And if not for that infernal Search and Seizure (Section 132 of the Income Tax Act) I’d have failed by a wide margin.

I was now a qualified Chartered Accountant and ready for the job market………and marriage market 🙂 🙂

 

 

EPILOGUE

Nitin didn’t clear the exam.

(And surprisingly) Neither did my “guide”, Shyam.

(Actually not so surprising considering his umpteen tea time visits)

On getting to know the result Shyam’s mother was bitterly sarcastic “(Sigh) Adhukellaam Bhagavaanoada  anugraham  venumdaa !”

(“To pass in the CA exam one needs the Nuclear umbrella like protective shield and all pervading grace of the Lord”)

Shyam’s response was typical of his cocksure demeanour.

 “Bhagavaanoada anugraham ellaam vayndaam ……..Portions padichchaa poadhum”

(“No need for bullet proof shield….its sufficient to read the portions systematically”)

(Here  endeth  the  Lesson)

 

 

 

 

Advertisements

Published by

sravishanker1401gmailcom

Chartered Account by day, cartoonist and Writer by night, passionate athlete at twilight and dutiful householder on weekends  There are people who make things for the Western markets and those who do the same for the Indian market. I make cartoons for an audience who are rooted culturally in India but who are spiritually agile enough to assume Western sensibilities - who swear by Quentin Tarantino AND David Dhawan / Bharathiraja in the same breath - I make cartoons for this audience - the INDIAN diaspora in INDIA !

15 thoughts on “SEARCH AND SEIZURE”

  1. Zola – very well written. You have an uncanny knack of remembering old events and importantly articulating in an interesting manner, that makes it enjoyable to the reader. Keep it going.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. (Praveen writes in through mail)

    Zola..your stories pick up daily life situations,people around us, our concerns, how we handled them and looked forward to life as we grew up. They are woven and presented with good humour and delights the reader as it very much connects with thier own lives…congrats for writing another interesting piece….

    ok….here it is…your search and seizure did not give us seizures…

    Like

  3. Ravishanker – that was such a breezy read! Very nicely done. There was a lot of suspense and the best part was how you transported us to the exam hall. The nervousness, the glee upon seeing a predicted question…it was all so real because I guess it was indeed real 🙂 But your descriptions were vivid to the core.

    Out of curiosity – did those two buddies of yours clear the CA and become chartered accountants later? 🙂

    Once again, great job with a piece that was in equal parts witty and realistic.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Ram Murali : “That was a breezy read ” (whew) Whenever someone who reads my piece says this I feel nothing more to be said. I dont want readers to approach this as if they are going to a gym session of abdominal exercises.
    Thanks so much for your reassurance !

    yes – Whatever I’ve written about here really took place – word for word.

    Made my job as a writer very easy – I just had to get out of the way !

    Yes – both friends cleared the exams. Namma Madrasoada mannu apdee 🙂

    Like

    1. Yes – both friends cleared the exams
      –> Super super! Epdiyo, (to steal part of a Mouna Raagam line), kye-a suttu kaal-a suttu pass aana seri!
      Made my job as a writer very easy – I just had to get out of the way !
      –> You had all the ingredients, doesn’t mean that the meal could be automatically cooked fabulously. You knew exactly what to take and what to sift out. Sign of a very, very good writer. Please do more of these reality-based pieces. You’re excellent at it…keep going!

      Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s